All+about+me

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//All about me is just what it sounds like. It is all about the group. This area of the wiki is for group members to post thier own personal stories of how they make it from day to day. Some live "double lives", some have no problems at all, and others try to avoid it all together. This area is for those of us that don't mind telling what it is like. This group is like a family and if one of us has problem then we all have problem. This is not to bash anyone we do not like. This is to get the help we all want, need, and deserve.//=====

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What does it feel like to live a double life? What does if feel like to be somebody else for your family and somebody else at school? I would become my true self when I am at school. If I am myself, I am happy, smiling, and laughing. I feel safe and comfortable. This can be a bit confusing because at home, I feel insecure and depressed. At home, is where I stay in my room and live in my own world. I would isolate myself from my family because they could never understand any ways of my life. Why am I so different? That's the same question I heard for many years. To stop the questioning, I just withdraw myself. It's the best cure to keep me sane and stable. It's best to shut them up and not complain about me inside, out. My family and many others have questioned my style, my taste in music, my dark makeup, and my obscure poetry. If they ever found out I am bisexual, of course I would be disowned and kicked out. Either way, I stay unknown. I do not show my identity because in my household, accepting one is so hard to do. I have to numb myself on purpose so nothing would affect me if somebody criticize me. Depressing yes, but I just deal with it and it's okay. Can it be confusing to live a double life? A little, but the more I remain in the dark nobody at home will see the true me. I hide the other side of me, which I like more; however, I can't show it. People do not deserve such privilege, especially if such mistreatment is going to be the result.=====

~Unknown Soul
What does it feel like to live a double life? That is the question that I have asked others and I have asked myself. It is not easy and it is more stressful than people think. Living a double life can sometimes make you feel like you are trapped. Being in my own home is like hell. I toss and turn at night because I am worrying that one day my family will turn on me and I will be left out in the cold. All my life I have put my feelings toward girls aside because I was never taught about it. My parents have gone against me being bisexual because I had never expressed it in my younger years. My friends support me more than my own family. My family choose not to let that side of me be in their mind. They have asked me to not be bisexual until I am 18 and that is something that I do not understand. Morally we are supposed to love one another and that to me means that you love that person no matter their “faults”. I personally do not believe that who you are has an age limit. My own parents have not accepted that part of me and they never will because my own father has told me that when I am 18 he will not have to deal with me and what I choose to do with my life. That is something no child wants to here from the people that have raised them to not judge people for who they are. No child wants to be told my the people they look up to that who they are is not OK and that they need to be fixed. Living a double life is not something that I love but it is something that I have to deal with until I am able to get out on my own and not be a burden to my parents. ~Don't Fix Me